out of mobile range
Posted on December 25th, 2004, under Travel
Woah, does Rachel sound the perfect girl or what?
“At the moment I’m just faffing about the house reading Manovich and Middlesex and baking chocolate cake.”
That could just be the most inviting sentence imaginable, except that there has been plenty of competition this week. For example, last night, when the crowds had subsided from the wharf at Hobart, and I had located the last of a bunch of ol mates, I was invited back to Dave’s place to ‘hang out, smoke pot and play records’. I was even allowed to choose the records. And then when I said something like, ‘Errm, that sounds divine, but I don’t really do pot all that well, just take a look at me’, Dave summons this incredibly serious look to assure me: ‘Oh don’t worry. There’s vodka’.
Of course I didn’t go, but Dave still made my night. I’ve always wanted to be that girl.
So far I have received a Winnie the Pooh photo frame from Santa (updates are available on request). I saw my Nanna, who doesn’t know who I am anymore, then had an impromtu chicken sandwich in an SUV while waiting for a ferry for two hours. My dad, his fiancee and I drank wine straight out of the bottle. Make no mistake, I’m all about the class.
So: Merry Christmas dear readers. Thanks for keeping me company. And Rachel, I am so calling you. Unless I have any more major life changes this week, I’ll be back on the 9th, very thirsty.
On December 25th, 2004 at 10:46 pm, Mel said:
Merry Christmas Mel! I got Geoffrey Blainey’s “A Very Short History of the World”. That’s the kind of girl I am.
On December 26th, 2004 at 3:26 am, Christian McCrea said:
Okay, that’s a pretty good line. But check out:
“Hey, want to come back to my place and check out my newborn kittens?”
“This morning I was planting raspberries and had an idea about state power.”
And one, far too forward but in context less so, which was used on me, but I had to decline:
“Do you have a copy of A Thousand Plateaus near your bed I could borrow?”
On December 26th, 2004 at 10:31 am, mc gregg said:
Over the next few weeks I’m writing a book chapter called ‘Theory as Party-Starter’ for a Deleuze collection… Christian, I may have to source that quote! It’s too perfect.
On December 26th, 2004 at 4:44 pm, Christian McCrea said:
Yeah, use it, but you have to footnote that I should have taken the offer.
But I’ve heard an even hotter line recently..
“I’m writing a book chapter called ‘Theory as Party-Starter’ for a Deleuze collection”
Referencing yourself is a long tradition and has many rules, but I suggest the rather more fun method of : ‘In this, I merely refer to myself.(1)’
(1) - Me
On December 26th, 2004 at 5:03 pm, Christian McCrea said:
Also, as a rejection:
“Sorry, I don’t sleep with formalists.”
(actually used by a friend of mine.)
The term ‘theoryslut’ comes to mind, although not together the best term for academic discourse. It did the round of blogs a while ago as a sort of quiz - along the lines of “which kind of theorist would you be most likely to try and sleep with”, the assumption being that theorists are automatically on the to-do list of a broader group of theorysluts, who we can assume are largely made up of postgraduate students in humanities departments the world over.
Theory people have crushes on each other all the time, that’s what a culture of mutual referencing and appreciation involves, doesn’t it? Isn’t there at least one form of foreplay in the acknowledgment page of every thesis? There’s something in the reptilian part of our mind that sees mutual reading lists as an automatic potential mate, certainly until we get our fingers burnt a few times and learn to be more discerning.
(aside - The Theory People would make a great band name / Dr. Who vilian / enemy in a post-modern superhero comic.)
The English department at unimelb (apart from being absurdly sexy) are probably reigning world masters of the theory pick-up, but there’s a lot of literati-sexy to draw on as well, so the line is blurred. I’ve seen groups of them go out, both major sexes and all persuasions, as if it was buffalo hunting.
My cinema studies department is a lot more subdued, but what we make up in bombast we make up in sheer attractiveness. Cinema people are usually to be found having mussy-haired 8am coffees with wanting-to-be-struggling-but-struggling-even-at-that artists and cultural well-to-dos. I think this is because only a certain type of person can be picked up with a Fassbinder reference.
You should ask everybody if someone’s theory background has even made anybody more attractive, or vice versa. Gather anecdotes.
Also, remember that theory is often a party-breaker. Someone mentions post-structuralism and it can often be the end of a night.
-Christian
On December 27th, 2004 at 12:35 pm, Mel said:
I will have to throw up violently and then disagree with Christian about the sexiness of the English department. I feel quite strongly - and so do a number of my friends in the department - that the postgraduate culture there has been co-opted by a pack of macho idiots who reify continental philosophy, and deliberately belittle and exclude anyone whose own research interests don’t coincide with pure theory. eg: “My thesis is about [theorist].” Me: “Oh yes, what about [theorist]?” “Oh no, it’s a monograph about [theorist].”
I call them the “hobbit philosophers”.
I also resent what I see as the prevalent attitude among these men - that chicks do ‘fluffy’, ‘pop-culture’ research and are only accepted as potential sexual partners for the men; or they do hardcore theory and are fetishised as theory sex goddesses. It makes me fucking sick.
It’s only when I go to conferences and see other universities’ friendly, respectful and collegial research cultures that I realise how freakish the English department is. I am so glad to be out of there.
On December 27th, 2004 at 3:03 pm, Christian McCrea said:
Mel, I don’t think we’re disagreeing! I thought I was being quite negative - hence the buffalo hunting analogy. I think your characterisations are probably spot on from what I’ve seen there, but I don’t really know any of the people or culture there to any extent except for one person, who I know from before uni.
I’ve only seen people from English in action socially, and may not be part of this mad macho clique you’re describing. I was only describing them in pick-up mode, which is part of the aggression you’re talking about. I certainly know a couple of people have run screaming from that place with similar experiences.
.. but like I said, I don’t know. I’m aware of that kind of attitude about continental philosophy and the denigration of women theorists in people I’ve met in the past. If it really is institutional there, then holy shit.
“My thesis is about [theorist].” Me: “Oh yes, what about [theorist]?” “Oh no, it’s a monograph about [theorist].”
Jesus christ. I’ve had that conversation this very week. Verbatim.
On December 27th, 2004 at 7:33 pm, jean said:
“hobbit philosophers”.., I pay that one big time. And being a boorish, buffonish queenslander, that culture completely, utterly mystifies me, each and every time I come up against it. Thankfully, as happens to all empty fashions (however intensely they practice being Movements) I reckon it’s all a bit over. BTW my shorthand for those people is left over from my previous life as a classical musician. I call it “black skivvy” academia.
On December 29th, 2004 at 1:02 am, Glen said:
haha, ‘fashionable movements’ that would be like what happens in the dunnies of aforementioned uni depts as well as across the pages of the thesis; simulacra of wicked shit loses its wicked-stix status and becoming shit. The fuckin 80’s weren’t that cool.
Sorry unimelb mel, but I like sometimes being a theory-nerd. Not for sex, of course, even though the thought is quite I-got-hole-in-my-bucket fun, but because of my mechanic tendencies thwarted by this notion that ‘I wanna be an academic’ (sung to the tune of Jill Sobule’s cracker), hence becoming more-academic-than-academic and achieving nerderness. Although I am more of a kind of Booger nerd than anything else… in fact I have been inspired…
On December 29th, 2004 at 1:20 am, Glen said:
http://glenfuller.blogspot.com/2004/12/as-funny-as-lemon-juice-in-little.html
done! haha!
On December 29th, 2004 at 1:24 am, Christian said:
I just had a conversation with one of these hobbits since I last commented. If you really want to offend one of these guys, tell them your PhD is on computer games.
…but unimelb is going to be a bit different in 05 anyway. There’s big departmental-conjoining fun ahead and much flesh will be cut from many bones so we will see where the chips fall.
Aside: good LOTR protest sign: “MORDOR OUT OF ROHAN NOW”